One 17 Year Old's Story of Domestic Violence

It's August 2, 1988, the summer before my senior year in high school as I sit in the passenger seat of my boyfriends car. He's driving me to an orthodontist appointment and is complaining that I hadn't been truthful about the distance he'd be driving to get me there. "Well nevermind then, just take me back home", I suggest, perhaps a little too "nonchalant" for his taste. "You had me drive all this way to tell me to turn around?" he yells. "No, I think I'll take you by my cousins house, he just got out of jail for rape", he says, leaving me afraid of the possibilities of what was to come. When he pulled up in front of the house, in Compton or Carson, by this point my mind was on a "get-a-way", I informed him I'd wait in the car until he returned. He came out a short time later, alone, I guess his cousin wasn't "game", or it was all a trick to scare me, either way, I was safe from that encounter.

He gets in and drives back to his side of town only to arrive at yet another relatives house. By this time it's high noon in the middle of summer, as he informs me that if I get out of the car he will shot me. He says this as he tucks his pistol into the front of his pants. So, now I know where I am, and could easily get out and hop onto one of the city busses that are passing by every 10 minutes or so, but I don't want to take a chance. So I sit and I sit. I roll the windows down, hoping for a breeze that never comes, when I realize is breifcase is sitting at my feet. When I see him with his cousin in the back yard under the hood of a car, I decide to ease the briefcase open and take a some money! Call me a fool, I know, because if he had found out before I made my get-a-way...I may never have. That morning my mom had given me money to get to the dentist so I had my own money. Like they say, God looks out for fools and babies, he sure was looking out for me that day.
I sat in that car for about 2 hours before he came out. He then drove to the gas station and demanded I give him money for the tank. I gave him all that he knew I had, $10. After he fills the tank we head next door to a Jack-in-the-Box, where he pulls into the drive-thru and orders himself some food. He snatches my purse to see if I had any more money...and that's when the fighting ensued. Thank the Lord, I had not put his $127 in my wallet, but rather stuffed it into my panties. He was trying to leave me with nothing, no way to get home. I may have been a fool but I wasn't a complete idiot. When I tried to grab my purse back, he put his hand around my throat and began to squeeze. The girl at the window just sat there, eyes big, mouth open. I swung and fought, for dear life as breathing became more and more difficult. I got free, grabbed as many of my belongings as I could and barefoot, I hopped on the RTD, that seemed to be waiting there just for me, because no sooner than I got on did the doors close...I had got away...or so I thought.

After several stops the bus pulled over for a shift change. The driver exited the bus with his belongings and paperwork, chatted with the new driver and gave my boyfriend enough time to park, enter the bus and attempt to convense me to go with him, he'd been following the bus. I refused and when the new driver got on, he got off. I rode that bus to Pico Blvd and La Cienega where I made my transfer to a Blue Bus (a line that serves West L.A./Westwood/Santa Monica). As I walk over to the bus bench I notice a neighbor and friend. I begin sharing with her my days events. As I'm talking, I notice she's making an annoyed face to someone behind me, I turn and it's him! Luckily, this too, was a crowded area so he only pleaded for me to get into the car and did not use force, out of fear I'm sure. I declined, as the bus arrived. At my stop, I hastily exited and "high-tailed it" home, called my mom at work and then 911. Thank goodness, I was safely inside, because 911 never answered!

To explain a little further, I had been introduced to him by my friend that was dating his brother, and when he'd came to my door and I didn't answer he immediately went to her house, and brought her to mine. When she knocked at the door, I refused to open it until I could see him standing in the street (a far enough distance that he couldn't barge in). We talked, my friend and I, then he took her back home. I never opened the door or even for one minute, considered opening it.

When my mom arrived home from work, there were a dozen roses on the step. I can't remember who threw them away, my mom or me but I never talked to him again!

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